I Rely on My Happy Pills

It is rather difficult to explain to non-forgetful people how frustrating it is to be a forgetful person but humor me for a second as I make an attempt. 

Every day I take medication to help with my depression. I take one of those medications that you've probably seen a commercial for and thought, "this is so weird." Yeah that's me. I put this medication on a pewter tray in my kitchen and it stays there so I never forget to take it. Well one day last week I decided to put my medication in my purse for some reason and of course, I forgot that I put it there. So I spent four days trying to find this stupid medication only to find that it had literally been with me everywhere I went that entire week. 

Needless to say I spent four days off of my meds and it was bad news. At first I was fine and didn't notice a difference. Then all of the sudden I started being overly-emotional about everything and my emotions were exhausting me. 

I learned a valuable lesson for about the hundredth time, I need my medication. And for some reason that really irks me. I hate that I need something to keep me stable but it is simply a fact of my life. And I've decided to be okay with that. 

I realize that the majority of you, my supportive readers, may not need to take a daily pill to keep yourselves emotionally stable, but perhaps a daily prescription (self-prescribed that is) is in order. We all need a good "happy pill." Maybe yours is going for a ten mile run. Or maybe it's a couple episodes of your favorite Netflix show. No matter what you decide, rest-assured we all need an equivalent of Han's Happy Pills. 

Since having depression, I have learned that it's completely acceptable and matter-of-factly essential for me to take care of myself. So not only do I need my prescribed pills every day, but I need plenty of other things every day in order to be happy. I need to be able to love someone. I need to be able to have at least a few minutes all to myself, even if that can only happen while driving. And most of all, I need to be able to pray, every single day. Even when no other happy pills seem to be taking effect, Heavenly Father is always there and constantly reaching out to Him brings me greater happiness than any other "pill" can. 

So go find your happy pill, whatever it may be!  

xoxo, 

Han

Show Me How Big Your Brave Is

I've been thinking a lot about bravery. What does it mean to be brave?

I would venture to say that most things we do in life require lots and lots of bravery.

It took bravery for me to admit that I was sick.
It took bravery for me to have my mom check me in to a mental health institute.
It took bravery for me to decide to go to college.

And every day it takes bravery for me to do things that I don't always want to do. I have learned through the whole two decades that I've been alive (such a long time, I know) that the best things in life often come from outrageous acts of bravery. It was outrageous for me to have that scary conversation with this extremely attractive boy. It was outrageous for me to write a blog that exposes all of my deepest secrets about my personal challenges. And it was super outrageous for me to decide to leave school for four months to go live in London.

But it's through these outrageous acts of courage that I have learned the most about who I am and who I want to be. By taking these leaps of faith, I have learned to thrive off of my practicing bravery.

There's a song by Sara Barailles called "Brave," I am sure you've heard it because it is probably the most over-played song on the radio as of the last four months. Anyway, the message this song contains inspires me! Sara (my home girl) says "Everybody's been there. Everybody's been stared down by the enemy... Don't run and show me, how big your brave is." I freaking love that. Everybody has been attacked by Satan at some point but everyone also has an opportunity to "show their brave" if you will.

My challenge for you this upcoming month of August (my favorite month due to my birthday obviously) is to show me your brave! Let's see it. What's something you have been just too afraid to do? Find it and go get it. Have you been afraid to ask for help? Well then ask for help! Have you been afraid to get out of a bad relationship? Then get out! It's your time to show me your brave. So let's see it!

And next time you hear that ridiculously over-played gem of a song, I hope you'll blast it and tell yourself that it's your time to be brave!!! Happy almost August, my beautiful readers.

xoxo,
han